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Masturbations

Send us all your sexual pleasures problems and questions. (We do have a resident doctor on board if you don't know what Rumpy-Pumpy is or have never even heard of it) :yes:
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Sir William
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Masturbations

Post by Sir William » Thu Oct 05, 2017 9:24 am

Why does masturbation produce an ejaculation? :wink:

And it's gott*en nothing to do with it rhyming. :duh:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Thu Oct 05, 2017 8:35 pm

I'm still waiting. :mad:

:hurry: :hurry: :hurry:
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Doctor Cheery
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Doctor Cheery » Fri Oct 06, 2017 9:44 am

:ho: :ho: Yes, I gather it gets more difficult as you gett*en older, Sir William.... :snigger: :wink:

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Re: Masturbation

Post by Runaway » Fri Oct 06, 2017 10:05 am

That sounds like the voice of experience. :hide:

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Sir William
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:47 am

Doctor Cheery wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 9:44 am
:ho: :ho: Yes, I gather it gets more difficult as you gett*en older, Sir William.... :snigger: :wink:
Yes it does gett*en harder and harder. :wink:

:snigger:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:54 am

So, you bumble-brained members - Why does masturbation produce an ejaculation? (In fact why does masturbation w**k at all?*) :search:

The brain controls everything, and it knows that no insemination is possible, so why does it produce an ejaculation?
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I would expect a Dr to offer some explanations for this; not to act dum and post silly comments. :stop:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Runaway » Fri Oct 06, 2017 2:34 pm

Perhaps the Doctor is too busy filling in his application form for this job:

Vacancy

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Sir William
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Fri Oct 06, 2017 2:49 pm

"Applications close in mid-September." :mad: :thumbd:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Mon Oct 09, 2017 8:55 pm

Following on from this very stimulating discussion. :doh: :doh:

Do I go blind if I masturbate somebody else? :wink:

Is it even technically possible to masturbate somebody else? :vconfused:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Runaway » Mon Oct 09, 2017 8:58 pm

I thought we'd buried this topic.... :hurry:

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Sir William
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Mon Oct 09, 2017 9:01 pm

Mr Ru*naway - just because you are too embarassed to talk about this sort of thing. :duh: :bash:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Runaway » Mon Oct 09, 2017 9:11 pm

I have a reputation to maintain.
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Sir William » Mon Oct 09, 2017 9:32 pm

What's your Mummy doing there? :snigger:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by Runaway » Mon Oct 09, 2017 9:54 pm

Not possible, sadly... :cry:

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Re: Masturbations

Post by Sir William » Tue Oct 10, 2017 11:15 am

:cry: :cry:

Anyway - Do I go blind if I masturbate somebody else? :wink:

Is it even technically possible to masturbate somebody else? :vconfused:
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Re: Masturbations

Post by Doctor Cheery » Tue Oct 10, 2017 1:10 pm

Sir William wrote:
Tue Oct 10, 2017 11:15 am
:cry: :cry:

Anyway - Do I go blind if I masturbate somebody else? :wink:

Is it even technically possible to masturbate somebody else? :vconfused:
:ho: Although I am a doctor, an even greater wealth of knowledge on this specific point exists elsewhere. :yes:
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Re: Masturbations

Post by Sir William » Tue Oct 10, 2017 8:26 pm

:hscratch:
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Re: Masturbations

Post by Sir William » Tue Mar 06, 2018 12:23 pm

I was wondering whether any member had done further research into this important subject. :search:
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Re: Masturbation

Post by anepictree » Tue Mar 06, 2018 6:10 pm

Sir William wrote:
Fri Oct 06, 2017 11:54 am
So, you bumble-brained members - Why does masturbation produce an ejaculation? (In fact why does masturbation w**k at all?*) :search:

The brain controls everything, and it knows that no insemination is possible, so why does it produce an ejaculation?
► Show Spoiler
In order to understand this complex question you need to have **** your Darwin or your Attenborough (he couldn't demonstrate this on TV unfortunately) but actually the millions and millions of ***** that are created within the male g****s do not live indefinitely and have to be 'removed' in order to manufacture place for new fresh ones - So in order to assure perenity of the species, in times of it being not gott*n on a regular basis (for example due to forgetting to buy flowers on her birthday, forgetting the w***ing anniversary or her having it *** with the milkman) it has to be Brought out 'by hand' so as to speak. This way we are guaranteed a fresh supply of top quality *********oids in order to recreate.

All this shows that the brain is not as clever as it thinks it is (well not Mr RunAways anyway)

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Re: Masturbations

Post by Sir William » Tue Mar 06, 2018 8:07 pm

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

Horay for Mr Tree's serious answer to this very pertinent question. And he happens to be quite right. :clap: :clap: :clap:

Even Dr Cheery couldn't (or was too prudish to) discuss this topic; and Messrs R*unaway and Nil*ly didn't have a clue (as usual). :duh:

I am most impressed by Mr Tree's mature attitude to these disgusting matters. :yes: :yes: :clap: :clap: :clap: :bigthumbsup:

Now perhaps he could also tell us which person of a mutually-masturbating pair goes blind. Is it the masturbator or the masturbatee. This may require some experimentation. :bigthumbsup:
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Re: Masturbations

Post by anepictree » Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:23 pm

Thank you for your compliments :oops: I am embarrassed to be singled out for my expertise, but this was my best subject at school :wink:

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Re: Masturbations

Post by Runaway » Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:24 pm

Yes it took the local Council several days to clean more elevated afterwards.

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Sir William
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Re: Masturbations

Post by Sir William » Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:05 pm

:o

But the research had to be done. :wink:
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Re: Masturbations

Post by Runaway » Tue Mar 06, 2018 10:08 pm

Yes I suppose you did. :cantlook:

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Re: Masturbations

Post by anepictree » Wed Mar 07, 2018 10:34 pm

Yes the audience gave him a big hand at the end :cripes: :cantlook:

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