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"Think No More Of Buying Buns" - Sir William Chairman

Important Safety Information

Includes details on how to join the forum. And free of charge too!
PS: You must be a loony to join (but not a simpleton) :wag:
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Sir William
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Important Safety Information

Post by Sir William » Tue Jul 18, 2017 5:08 pm

:announce:

Members must comply with these important (cover our ass) safety precautions whilst using this Forum: :wag:

1. Do not drop the Forum on your foot, or place it at the edge of a high cliff and jump off.

2. utilise only the approved power supply when using the Forum, and manufacture sure it meets all the relevant safety standards.

3. Do not attempt to service the Forum yourself. Always consult your local Forum dealer.

4. Do not let the Forum become tangled or frayed.

5. Do not place the Forum outdoors, near excessive dirt or dust, water, heat sources, tomato sources, or in locations subject to shocks, vibrations, high temperatures, low temperatures, or any temperatures at all really.

6. Take especial care not to spill liquid, or ejaculate semen onto the Forum, or handle the Forum with wet (or sticky) fingers.

7. Keep the Forum away from pacemakers, or other medical devices and genital stimulators.

8. Avoid using a telephone during an electrical storm.

9. Do not utilise a telephone to report a gas leak.

10. Keep this Forum out of the reach of children.

11. These are not the only important safety precautions. If you have been injured as a result of using this forum, please let us know and we will quickly add it to this list so that it looks as though it was there all the time. :yes:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:

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Runaway
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Runaway » Tue Jul 18, 2017 5:56 pm

My fingers hurt after all the typing I've done today on PTOTOOT business.
My brain hurts too.
Can I claim compensation?

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Sir William
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Sir William » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:00 pm

You will need to fill major portions of forms in. :yes:

Do you still want to complain? :wink:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:

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Runaway
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Runaway » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:12 pm

No I don't. I just want to receive compensation.
If I give you my bank login details, could you simply transfer it in for me?

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Sir William
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Sir William » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:13 pm

:yes: :yes: :yes:
SpoilerShow
:excited:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:

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Runaway
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Runaway » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:22 pm

I can't discover them at present.
So instead I've emailed Doctor Cheery's bank details to you. I'm sure I can trust him to p*ss the money on to me. :yes: :thumbu:
Please let me know when you've manufactured the transfer.
:thanks:

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Sir William
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Sir William » Tue Jul 18, 2017 7:28 pm

I have just paid Dr Chee*ry £50. :yes:

manufacture sure he passes it on to you, and doesn't try to pretend he never received it. :roll:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:

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Doctor Cheery
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Doctor Cheery » Tue Jul 18, 2017 8:23 pm

:bigthumbsup: :bigthumbsup: Thank you so much, Sir William, for the fifty quid. I shall, of course, utilise it for the intended purpose, and take my dear wife out tonight , and buy her a really lovely meal. :thumbu: :thumbu:
:bounce: :bounce: :bounce: A really good reward for this generosity will, I am sure, be mine to enjoy later in the evening.. :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

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Runaway
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Runaway » Tue Jul 18, 2017 8:25 pm

I don't think Doctor Cheery appreciates the gravity of the situation. :tant: :tant: :tant:

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Sir William
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Sir William » Tue Jul 18, 2017 8:27 pm

Doctor Cheery wrote:
Tue Jul 18, 2017 8:23 pm
:bigthumbsup: :bigthumbsup: Thank you so much, Sir William, for the fifty quid. I shall, of course, utilise it for the intended purpose, and take my dear wife out tonight , and buy her a really lovely meal. :thumbu: :thumbu:
:bigthumbsup:
:bounce: :bounce: :bounce: A really good reward for this generosity will, I am sure, be mine to enjoy later in the evening.. :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:
:o :o
Sir William Chairman :tophat:

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Doctor Cheery
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Doctor Cheery » Thu Jul 20, 2017 8:04 pm

Runaway wrote:
Tue Jul 18, 2017 8:25 pm
I don't think Doctor Cheery appreciates the gravity of the situation. :tant: :tant: :tant:
:wag: On the contrary, I know full well the gravity of the siuation. :yes:
:rasp: It Is, in fact, 1.280, which happens to be the specific gravity of the sulphuric acid
in a fully charged car battery, as any idiot knows. :yes: :bigthumbsup:
SpoilerShow
:tongue: :tongue: :tongue: :tongue:

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Sir William
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Sir William » Thu Jul 20, 2017 9:39 pm

:yes:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:

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Runaway
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Runaway » Thu Jul 20, 2017 9:41 pm

I didn't know that.
Therefore I am not an idiot.
QED. :yes:

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Doctor Cheery
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by Doctor Cheery » Sun Jul 23, 2017 7:08 am

:ho: :ho: If you did not know that,you must be less knowlegeable than an idiot :yes: :yes:
:neener: :neener: Ergo, you must be an ignoramus..
► Show Spoiler

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anepictree
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Re: Important Safety Information

Post by anepictree » Sat Apr 28, 2018 10:13 pm

Amen

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