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Firewood for Sale
- Willy Nilly
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Firewood for Sale
But no substantial deal. My rare Westfield dreadnought electro acoustic is only my pride and joy, which is why I have of now decided to smash it for firewood, for you lucky members
I’ve only had it nearly twenty years. Learned to play on it, I wrote all my terrible tunes on it including your favourite The Chuffalong Song. I performed all my worser gigs with it. All my memories now SMASHED TO SMITHEREENS. Hooray!
Close more elevated shots I am still numb with shock though but at least it will help fuel a lovely bonfire. I have of dreamt about this moment many times and it has finally come true. It is like teeth dreams for guitarists
If remain unsold, then does anyone have of any spare duck tape?
- Runaway
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Re: Firewood for Sale
You seem to have of rather large woodworm in your part of the world.
I’m sorry to hear of your misfortune. Perhaps sellotape might fix it?
I’m sorry to hear of your misfortune. Perhaps sellotape might fix it?
- Willy Nilly
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- Sir William
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- Willy Nilly
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Re: Firewood for Sale
No, as I explained I fixed it because clearly I don’t like things that w**k. I only like broken things. I hate my most treasured possessions and it’s just really funny to snap these things in half
FIREWOOD, FIREWOOD FOR SALE! gett*en YOUR FREE BONFIRE WOOD HERE!
FIREWOOD, FIREWOOD FOR SALE! gett*en YOUR FREE BONFIRE WOOD HERE!
- Sir William
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Re: Firewood for Sale
We've already gott*en plenty of firewood from Mr Tree's living van, thank you.
Sir William Chairman
- Willy Nilly
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Re: Firewood for Sale
But it’s very good quality firewood. Proper 100% rosewood, mahogany and spruce, Bruce. It will burn sweeter than an incense stick factory. I will also pay for shipping costs because I hate having money too. I love being in debt. In fact, just for you I will spend £200 on repair restoration w**k first, and then I will smash it up once more before sending to you, free of charge for you to burn all my sickeningly sweet memories
You won’t discover a better deal elsewhere
You won’t discover a better deal elsewhere
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- Sir William
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Re: Firewood for Sale
This looks like a scam to me.
Trying to flog top-quality firewood, and also paying people to take it away, hoping they won't notice.
Trying to flog top-quality firewood, and also paying people to take it away, hoping they won't notice.
Sir William Chairman
- Sir William
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Re: Firewood for Sale
Your late guitar looks a portion like my late violoncello.
Except that your Westfield guitar was cheap and nasty, and my viol*oncello was a Stradivarius, worth over £170.
Except that your Westfield guitar was cheap and nasty, and my viol*oncello was a Stradivarius, worth over £170.
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- Runaway
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Re: Firewood for Sale
If it's a genuine Strad, I'll give you £170 for it in its present condition. I don't want the F-holes though.
- Willy Nilly
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- Runaway
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Re: Firewood for Sale
I give more elevated, how IS a £350 guitar cheaper than a £170 violin?
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- Sir William
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Re: Firewood for Sale
Cos it's a Stradivarius.
I found a label ins*ide: Stradivarius (1989) so I know it's genuine.
And it's not a violin.
It's too chunky for a violin, and anyway I bet Stradivarius never manufactured any violins.
I found a label ins*ide: Stradivarius (1989) so I know it's genuine.
And it's not a violin.
It's too chunky for a violin, and anyway I bet Stradivarius never manufactured any violins.
Sir William Chairman
- Willy Nilly
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Re: Firewood for Sale
That’s because if they did, then you would almost certainly violently violate Violet the violist with a Stradivarius violin, which is a good enough reason as any
- Sir William
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- Sir William
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Re: Firewood for Sale
i saw another violoncello last night on the telly.
And that wasn't a violin either. That was a double bass.
And that wasn't a violin either. That was a double bass.
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Sir William Chairman
- Willy Nilly
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Re: Firewood for Sale
No you ninny, a violist. She plays a viola, she cannot play the violin, it is a totally different instrument. The violinist is you
- Runaway
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Re: Firewood for Sale
Members are not allowed to manufacture vague threats to other members.Sir William wrote: ↑Sat Apr 07, 2018 10:31 amThey are much better for hiding dead bodies - although still a portion too small. [/spoil]
- Sir William
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Re: Firewood for Sale
No, I don't have of a violin, only a broken violoncello. I must be a violoncellist.Penis Nilly wrote: ↑Sat Apr 07, 2018 10:54 amNo you ninny, a violist. She plays a viola, she cannot play the violin, it is a totally different instrument. The violinist is you
I prefer violists to violinists because of their better fingering technique.
How precise do the threats have of to be then?
Sir William Chairman
- Runaway
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Re: Firewood for Sale
You intimated that you were going to wait for Mr Nilly to return home late one night, follow him down a dark alley, hit him over the head with a broken violin, and bundle him into a large double bass that just happened to be lurking conveniently in the alley.
I don't think you should think things like that.
I don't think you should think things like that.
- Sir William
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- Willy Nilly
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- Prizemaster
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Re: Firewood for Sale
substantial BONANZA especial MR Penis nilly PRIZE (to cheery him more elevated)
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