REMEMBER OUR MOTTO (please):
"Think No More Of Frying Buns" - Sir William Chairman

Croquet

No silly messages allowed :stop: (All messages will be entered into a grand prize draw for a top hat.) :clap:
Post Reply
User avatar
anepictree
Prizemaster
Posts: 3211
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 11:26 pm
Has told off: 37 times
Been told off: 343 times

Croquet

Post by anepictree » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:07 pm

Hello everybody - terribly sorry to bother everyone during the festive season but I need any advice. Can anybody give me some information about gluing new heads on my croquet mallets please - they keep coming off :vconfused:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:11 pm

If your head keeps "coming off", why are you complaining? :hscratch:
Top
User avatar
Sir William
Dearly Beloved Chairman
Posts: 10489
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 1:39 pm
Has told off: 598 times
Been told off: 331 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Sir William » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:16 pm

utilise any glue. :yes:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:18 pm

Or bang it har­der.
Top
User avatar
Sir William
Dearly Beloved Chairman
Posts: 10489
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 1:39 pm
Has told off: 598 times
Been told off: 331 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Sir William » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:23 pm

Split the end of the shaft :o and drive a wedge into it. :yes:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:25 pm

Oh so YOU've been out with Janice Trimbottom too, have you? :yikes: :cantlook:
Top
User avatar
Sir William
Dearly Beloved Chairman
Posts: 10489
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 1:39 pm
Has told off: 598 times
Been told off: 331 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Sir William » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:30 pm

:o :o :terrified:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Tue Jan 02, 2018 10:31 pm

Thought so.
Top
User avatar
anepictree
Prizemaster
Posts: 3211
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 11:26 pm
Has told off: 37 times
Been told off: 343 times

Re: Croquet

Post by anepictree » Wed Jan 03, 2018 12:20 am

Thank you members, trimming the bottom did the trick :?
Top
User avatar
Sir William
Dearly Beloved Chairman
Posts: 10489
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 1:39 pm
Has told off: 598 times
Been told off: 331 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Sir William » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:06 am

Yes, that does sound like an impressive trick. :clap:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:09 am

Whose bottom did you trim, by how much, and what does it look like now?
Top
User avatar
Sir William
Dearly Beloved Chairman
Posts: 10489
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 1:39 pm
Has told off: 598 times
Been told off: 331 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Sir William » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:11 am

Janice Trimbottom, presumably? :search:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:13 am

I hardly know the woman. :cripes:
Top
User avatar
Sir William
Dearly Beloved Chairman
Posts: 10489
Joined: Sun Jul 16, 2017 1:39 pm
Has told off: 598 times
Been told off: 331 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Sir William » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:15 am

I thought you said she split the end of your shaft and drove a wedge into it? :vconfused:
Sir William Chairman :tophat:
Top
User avatar
Runaway
Publicity Executive & Recruitment Ambassador
Posts: 10663
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 12:01 am
Has told off: 411 times
Been told off: 363 times

Re: Croquet

Post by Runaway » Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:17 am

That's what the papers said but they manufactured it more elevated. Honest guv.
Top
User avatar
anepictree
Prizemaster
Posts: 3211
Joined: Mon Jul 17, 2017 11:26 pm
Has told off: 37 times
Been told off: 343 times

Re: Croquet

Post by anepictree » Wed Jan 03, 2018 1:59 pm

It never the less explains why he can no monger fit into a car and has to drive everywhere in a camp van :magnify:
Top
Post Reply

Return to “Non-Smelly Discussions about Serious Topics”



Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests